Reflections 3/4/2020: Yesterday I decided to brave going to Bible Study with my incessant itch in full bore. Donned these darling pink gloves to keep from succumbing to the urge to scratch. My small group was very supportive (and accepting) of how silly my hands looked, and even helped me turn the pages of my Bible! Self-sufficient me was humbled by their care and concern! This itch has broken me. Stripped me of any sense of control. Relentless, it defines my days… with the only escape being to  bury myself in bed and pray sleep will come. Today I will talk to the doctor about possibly using anti-anxiety meds to bring down the neurological level of intensity. Something has gone haywire in my nerve endings! But back to Bible Study. When we met as the larger group and the worship music came on, (Hillsong’s “New Wine”), the chorus hit me like a brick!

“In the crushing

In the pressing

You are making

New wine

In the soil, I

Now surrender

You are breaking

New ground (hey)

You are breaking

New ground.”

Found my pink gloved hands raising reactively in worship! At first was embarrassed that I had forgotten to take them off… then it struck me that You were using them in my “crushing, pressing and making.” What more apropos than those corny, pink gloves to express my absolute surrender in worship? Felt a little like Job reacting to his onslaught of suffering with these words. “Though He slay me, I will hope in Him!” And I will, God! Hope in You! I know You are good and can use this crushing to make “new wine” out of me! Pink gloves and all!